Il castello in viaggio

A tiny second before the explosion. I heard a fluff of air through the shoulders. I was humming a song. "Le cose belle," lei me aveva parlato una volta, "sono lente." Then it was really coming. Like a nineteen sixty two repeated in fast motion; the bulge of air distorted; the last sandhill crane. and I wondered if it would have felt like this when the dinossaurs said goodbye.

Lunch break

Peter used to look at the illuminated altar three times a week. Between one and two, on sunny afternoons, the light was best. Silently he thought about crocodiles, elephants, a backyard in Luanda he had not seen for ages, but which refused to leave, day or night.

Sin eso de muelles y aguas que no agotanse

jamás. y esos silencios sin nombre. If at least I knew what happened after they left. Twenty three years ago we still moved around the ship, the docks left unfinished, uncountable splattering of cold plateña water on the hull. Pero sin ganas, sin ningun sonido, waiting for something we knew had never been there.  A faded hope, tantos campeones, otros tangos, y aquellos años involucrandose en bruma.

Que habían dejado el muelle hace años

They left the quay years ago.
Floating, tied to the dock, weathered and fragile, it stood still. 

Paint gone. the key lock still worked, alright

they dance as we sit waiting

Cold outside

["You can sleep while I drive," she said. But that was long before the rain, ages before the streets of buenos aires engulfing our last dollar bills, before the tenor falling from stage at Corrientes, el olor del café y tantas medialunas slowly swallowing her back to the city, a rediscovery of your earlier - and only? - roots, a call desde las calles de San Telmo, and the Rio de la Plata slowly widening between us, then Colonia del Sacramento and all the Uruguayan ranchos, and later the vastitude of Brazil before more water, oceans, and our lost voices.

I slept, baby. I did. And you drove smoothly, nicely. A couple of times I remember vaguely to hear you sing. As you drove. Quietly you sung, I want to believe, all night long..]

"Você pode dormir enquanto eu dirijo," ela disse. Mas isso foi muito antes da chuva, séculos antes das ruas de buenos aires reclamando nossos últimos dólares, antes do tenor cair do palco em Corrientes, el olor delcafé y tantas medialunas lentamente lhe reclamando de volta à cidade, uma redescoberta de suas raízes primeiras - e únicas? - um chamado desde as ruas de San Telmo, e o Rio de la Plata lentamente se alargando entre nós, então Colonia del Sacramento e todos os pampas Uruguaios, depois as vastidões do Brasil antes de mais água, oceanos, e nossas vozes perdidas. 
Eu dormi, baby. Dormi. E você dirigiu suavemente, sem sobresaltos. Em duas ocasiões eu lembro vagamente de te ouvir cantar. Enquanto dirigias. Você cantou calmamente, quero crer, a noite toda..

I had read about Malawi

yet, earlier that day

Cracker house, or my grandpa's dwelling covered in ashes

[There is now too much dead foliage and rotten basura donde habito mi abuelo, hace tanto tiempo]

He used to live there, Joshua

Two o'clock on a July afternoon. Mary had not yet got up. It was so hot, your ears heard these estalos sometimes, as if crickets were all around you.

I thought the gate was ajar

but maybe not. There was no sun. clouds were lightly gray.

Garden in the rain

[Uma estória de camafeus, gato no parapeito da janela, chás e camaleões impossíveis pelo quintal coberto de um capim espesso.

Emily de cabelo preso, quase cega, que conhecera Capote, conheceu o menino que um dia partira para uma cidade perdida entre charcos e cigarras na Louisiana - não muito longe, ela disse, de Lafayette.

Que viu o marido morrer sobre a cama, paralitico até a fala depois de um tiro de revólver pelas costas num bar de Oil City. Que comprara ações da empresa de petróleo quando a primeira tubulação trouxe gás do campo de Caddo até Shreveport. Que perdera a plantação da família e os descendentes de uma centena de escravos, e fora a primeira na cidade a deixar negros beberem nos copos da casa.

Emily que muitos anos depois de 1964, mudou-se para Morgan City, e viveu até o final numa casa em John Street, saía para recolher o leite, o cabelo de um branco de nuvem preso num coque e um camafeu no pescoço, seguro por uma fita de renda.]

[A story of cameos, cat on windowsills, tea and impossible chameleons across a backyard covered with thick leaves.

Emily with her hair on a bun, almost blind, who met Capote, knew of a boy who one day left to a city lost between marshes and cicadas in Louisiana - not too far from Lafayette, she told me once.

She saw her husband dying on a bed, crippled up to his speech after a gunshot on the back, in a bar at Oil City. Who bought stocks from the oil company when the first pipeline bringing gas from Caddo field to Shreveport begun to operate. Who lost her family plantation and the descendants of one hundred slaves, and was the first woman in the city to allow negroes to drink in the house glasses.

Emily who, many years later, moved to Morgan City and lived the rest of her life in a house on John Street, went out every day to collect the milk, her hair white tied in a bun, wearing a cameo held by a lace tape around her neck]

Other conversations

[Pereira was a long time friend of that sidewalk, the shade of that almond tree. He also knew the smells that would come from the sewer, if the weather was too hot. Recognized the breeze that, on cooler days, would bring scents from the market two blocks down to the south, with its many stands selling spices, cheese, codfish, oils, and which fully supplied the whole universe of fancy restaurants in town.

Pereira had grown up through those streets. In the afternoons, he would wear out his voice announcing through his lungs unbelievable deals on fake leather bags, colored cotton socks and men's underwear. His grandfather sat on a leather stool as old as the place - this tabouret, he repeated often, had sat foot there with him the first day he opened those doors for business.

When electric trolleys still moved around, he sold fine fabrics, silk and Egyptian cotton. But business went sour, old residents moved away from the area and that part of downtown was filled mostly with street sellers during the day, catering for people who walked by the area, in and out of work, and homeless people - at night.

By the time the economy sunk really low - in the early eighties - his neighbor Jeremiah sold his business, gathered his things, and moved back to Santana. The building remained closed for decades, until it was sold, torn down, and a parking lot opened in its place. For forty-five years Jeremiah sold glasses. Reading and sun glasses. He passed away not long ago. A few months after Pereira's grandfather died, Joachim.

He drank coffee every afternoon, with cheese bought at the market two blocks down the street. Even when it was very hot - february afternoons were worse. At least he had the shade of the almond tree to cool down, a little, the hot breeze - when there was a breeze.

Pereira saw that tree grow old. He sold many leather bags, under its shade. And cotton socks. And saw and flerted with many women there. Some would stop to buy something, just to talk to him. Others would look at the business, and then at his dark brown eyes, smiling back and shining high on his large face, its skin darkened by the sun.

He never married, although had known many women. Pereira had a large smile, a soft but firm voice - that dropped to a deeper resonating tone when he screamed leather deals - and dark thick hair. Women liked his voice, the smile on his face and his way of looking always sure of what he said. He knew them well, liked them all, but went always back home alone.]

Shaky Brazilian Congress, at night

Camera shaking, no tripod available. It was lightly raining.

t was about 10pm. There was yet lots of rain to come, that night.

More storms. And trees.

It did rain, after all..

[During the last two years I've lived in the white building on the back, in a small apartment with lightly gray walls - except for the kitchen, with white tiles and terracotta floor. The day of the accident I followed my usual routine: woke up at 7, coffee, went out for a run - Bonny was with me, juice, shower, heard the news, kissed Bonny, said goodbye and left. On my bike.

I was at work when the news arrived the plant had just spilled all of its contents in the air. It was a rush, people got crazy. I did not expect that, the accident, neither the choice of who would get in the buses going out of town. Some people I worked with managed to get a place. I could not leave Bonny behind. I liked the way the sunlight hit the living room wall and made it appear to sparkle softly. So did Bonny, I know. We would just sit side by side, sometimes, watching that quiet color mutation, the last direct hits only lightly touching the upper levels of the wall right below the ceiling. We had a clear view in front of us. The open field extended for miles, sparingly dotted with trees that bloom beautifully early May, but that by late November, and especially with this cold arriving sooner, had only a few remaining leaves, and were mostly asleep, it seemed, waiting for a colder winter to come and go, before they shine once more.

So we could see far away. And the plant was not under our view. Its white clouds would usually come from behind, sometimes in large patches, dotting the usually blue sky with softly white patterns. Cotton like.

After the spill the clouds kept coming, mostly dark. I could not reach Bonny. Could not make it to the apartment, they sealed the area. The ravine was mostly poisonous, they said. Everything everywhere probably had become, I thought. I could not make it there. And have not seen Bonny, since.

I kept coming back, for weeks. My hope falling along with my hair, my nails, oh, such pain! I miss my living room, that soft sparkle on the wall, the scent of fresh grass, coming from the ravine in front of us. Bonny. I miss Bonny so much.]

Playing ahead of the storm

...but the place was newly done.

A year? Two?

Maybe that storm should just really fall.. and hard, on us..

 [The construction started a few years earlier, and had never been finished. The green mossy lawn initially projected was left undone and weeds took over the unpaved area, growing wild during the raining season, stalks as high as five feet suffocating the lower shrubs and almost hid the court behind their leaves.

During the summer months, still punctuated with sudden storms that darken the sky and in just a few minutes pour incomprehensible amounts of water, the court was used more often, kids playing soccer or skateboarding on the neglected cement, a lighter patch of half-hidden terrain.

The abandoned court was in disarray. The cement tint mostly washed out and faded, the low metal fence surrounding the court was broken in patches, wires untied and rusting in the air, the net behind the goalposts torn and shredded, fraying out and mostly gone. The backboard was reduced to a group of disarranged, swollen sheets, its basket sacked, and yet shone absurdly half-covered with spray marks.

I kept going back each afternoon, making my way through the risen-again shrubs, and deliriously sitting at its center, waiting for the roaring storm, madly waiting for the half-naked tree to make its swift move, two steps to the right.]

Mobile Mansion

1, 2, 3 and 4 Rooms

Trees at the avenue. Árvores no eixo

You would expect fancy views...

Sometimes, I all see (of all I looked at the entire day) is not much after all.

Perhaps, that's how we live most of the time: blindly looking and seeing so little

Esperando Justiça. Ou turistas...

A praça dos três poderes no domingo.. Uma visão da Justiça. No Sol.

A visão do ministro: Três, quatro, dois poderes ?

Pleno dia de sol. Todo o cerrado desse país em construção...

[From the Highest Court, you check Legislative and Executive, on a clear sky]

Árvore ou Caminho? Albero o un percorso?

 

Essas vontades conflitantes..
Diferente daquele caminho que "diverged on a yellow wood," a questão é se páro ou continuo em direção a um outro lugar...